


Just Breathe

by PensivePixie



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-19
Updated: 2015-01-19
Packaged: 2018-03-08 05:23:30
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3196949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PensivePixie/pseuds/PensivePixie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In the aftermath of Finn's death Raven has a panic attack. Wick is there for her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just Breathe

The lights from the torches were throwing flickering shadows making the scene seem unreal. Raven stood next to Bellamy and watched in horror as Clarke stepped away form a dead Finn. She had watched in confusion as Clarke had embraced him, kissing him and then slowly stepping away from as head slumped forward. 

In that moment, she was reminded of a black widow. One of those famous venomous spiders she had heard about in Earth Skills. Clarke was a black widow leaving behind a trail of destruction in those she loved. Or maybe, maybe Raven herself was the black widow. It wasn’t fair. Everyone loved Clarke and she had just taken the one person that Raven counted as family. 

She was screaming at the top of her lungs a litany of NO! NO! NO! NO! as she began to cry. She felt Bellamy catch her as she slid to the ground but blocked him out. The horrible scene was replaying in her mind over and over again as she started to tremble violently. Clarke had promised her it would be okay. Raven should have known. Nothing went right for her and now Finn was dead. 

It felt as if time slowed down and stopped. The world seemed to be closing in on her as her thoughts ran in relentless circles. FINN IS DEAD. FINN IS DEAD. CLARKE PROMISED AND NOW HE’S DEAD. HE SAVED MY LIFE AND HE’S DEAD. THE ONLY FAMILY I’VE EVER HAD AND HE’S DEAD. DEAD. DEAD. DEAD. FINN. OH FINN. The pain came crashing down on her then and a veil fell over her eyes.

She felt a strange pressure and pain building in her chest in a way she had never experienced before. It felt like her heart was going to burst out of her chest it was pounding so fast. It was a physical feeling of terror and panic clawing its way up her body and all she could do was scream. The pressure was mounting and building and then it wrapped itself around her throat. SHE COULDN’T BREATHE. SHE COULDN’T BREATHE. OH GOD. OH GOD. Her screaming tapered off as she fought to breathe. 

She needed to get out of there- to run- to get away –to punch and kick and scream but she couldn’t move and she couldn’t breathe. FINN IS DEAD. HE LEFT ME ALONE. OH GOD. SHE KILLED HIM. SHE KILLED HIM. SHE TOOK THE KNIFE AND SHE-

She wrenched herself forward into the mud and felt a cold sweat break out on her brow. She was completely numb to the outside world and didn’t hear Bellamy or Abby’s concerned questions floating around her. 

She couldn’t process more than the chaotic thoughts swarming her. FINN IS DEAD. FINN IS DEAD. I CAN’T BREATHE. I CAN’T BREATHE. FINN IS DEAD AND I’M ALL ALONE AND I CAN’T BREATHE.IT’S NOT FAIR. IT’S NOT FAIR. I CAN’T. I CAN’T. IT HURTS. OH GOD IT HURTS. 

I CAN’T BREATHE. I CAN’T BREATHE. I’M GOING TO DIE. I’M GOING TO DIE LIKE FINN. IT’S NOT OKAY. IT WILL NEVER BE OKAY AGAIN. She vaguely felt someone kneel in front of her and exchange words with Bellamy behind her. Hands wrapped around her face and gently tried to tilt it up. She struggled to get away but then she was hit by the familiar smell of machines, grease and mint. She reached forward to grip his shirt as she realized who it was.

“Raven, look at me,” he commanded. His thumbs were rubbing soothing circles on her temples. She slowly brought her eyes up to him still desperately trying to draw air into her lungs. She met his concerned gaze as he realized what was happening. 

“Listen to my voice. You’re having a panic attack but you need to breathe.” He pantomimed breathing long deep breaths. 

“Come on. In and out. Nice and slow,” he crooned to her. She kept her eyes locked with his and tried to draw the air into her lungs. “That’s good, yes like that. Keep going,” he said to her. 

“Easy. Easy. You gotta breathe.” He kept his hands on her face and his eyes bored into hers. She started to feel some of the pain in her chest relax as she followed his motions. It was becoming easier to breathe and the world was slowly coming back to her. She watched as he smiled at her and his brown eyes crinkled. 

“That’s it. You’re safe. Raven, I’ve got you,” he crooned. She nodded as she realized her breathing was evening out. She leaned forward and he let her bury her head in his chest. He moved his arms to wrap them around her as they sat together in the mud. He wasn’t sure how long they sat there with her softly crying and he rocking her but he knew it was a while. 

He had been in the back of the crowd while everything was going down. As soon as he realized what had happened he had immediately began to push his way through the crowd to get to her.  
Behind them he felt movement. Suddenly Jackson was at his elbow and pushing something in a syringe into Raven’s arm.

“What the hell man?” he bellowed. He had her now. What the hell did Jackson think he was doing?

“It’s a sedative to calm her. She’ll sleep now.” Wick looked up but Jackson had already moved on, another syringe in his hand, heading towards the newly returned Clarke. His eyes met Abby’s and she jerked her head towards the med bay.

Wick sighed and gathered her up in his arms. Even with her brace, she weighed next to nothing. She started to protest but the drug was already taking effect and she didn’t have a lot of strength left. She caught at his sleeve as he walked forward.

“Please don’t take me to the med bay. I want to be alone. Take me where no one can find me. Please, Wick,” she pleaded with him. He looked into her rapidly closing eyes and nodded again. She was drifting in and out when she felt him carry her into a hut and lower her onto a bed. Vaguely, she recognized his room though she had only been there once before. 

He removed her boots, brace and jacket and gently covered her with the blankets. “I’ll let you sleep but I’ll be back later. I promise.” 

As he turned to leave, she dragged her eyes open one last time. “Stay?” she whispered. She looked at him with heartbreak and desperation in her eyes and he knew he couldn’t leave her. He sat down on the bed next to her and she moved to wrap her arms around him and rebury herself in his chest. She needed the human contact. He leaned his head down on top of her hers and rubbed circles on her back as the drug finished dragging her under.

**Author's Note:**

> I love these two together and wish there was more of them. I had this idea after watching the winter finale and it wouldn't leave me alone. I haven't written anything in years so I hope its half way decent. Please let me know if you liked it or how I could do better. Thanks!


End file.
